Thursday, September 16, 2010

Girl advice 20

Well, Google raped my account, but no reason not to resume with our little lessons. :)

20: If you are shorter than average, avoid clubs or other crowded places. Girls may be telling you that height is not a big deal, but when in a club, every (scale 5-10) girl's ego is in the stratosphere due to big choice and constant attention from dozens of drunk guys, so she will always aim for the best one. And when choosing a best one, first thing is mind is how big he is.

Instead, choose small groups (<30), on seminars, gatherings, student groups, etc. in which you can get spotted easier. They are also better because everyone gets to know you and you have better chances to do less and accomplish more.

Monday, September 13, 2010

Girl advice 19

Oh, those exams. At least those went well. But I neglected this blog big time.


So, No 19: It may sound strange, but IRL, never take an advice from a girl. IRL girl advices are pure and utter crap. A girl who friendzoned you will either on purpose or not give you a wrong advice, ALWAYS. Why? Because, if you want to buy a car, would you expect from a car salesman to give you a secret how to score lower prices with other salesmen? Exactly. Same thing is with females. Deep down, we are wired to protect our crotch (our only weapon) from everybody. Only the best men we can get (call them Alphas or whatever) are allowed to access it, so filtering them from others is a priority.

You: "What is your ideal man?"
We: "Well, he has to be nice, smart, tall, caring, likes to cuddle, blah blah..."
A week later, we are dating a uncaring and charming douche who is actually a challenge and uber cool guy all girls want.

Sounds familiar? I thought so.

Remember two words: Status and Fame.

Sunday, September 5, 2010

Girl advice 18

This one is fresh from this night: If you want a vehicle that will make you attractive, get a motorbike. If getting excitement means wrapping our limbs around you while riding on your thing, we will apply this with you in other ways too.

Girl advice 17

Wear rings. There is something about rings. When we see a wedding ring, no matter how we pretend we don't like married guys, we will want to take him away from another woman.

Friday, September 3, 2010

Girl advice 16

Only unattractive and often rejected girls think of themselves as feminists. Those "feminists" reject traditional gender roles because they remind them how miserable their chances are. Most women with healthy mindset know that there is nothing degrading in total commitment to bringing another human being into this world and raising it.

Girl advice 15

The biggest fear a woman has is to be perceived as slut. We just love guys who encourage our sexuality without making it look like we are sick. Also, if you shut your mouth about that, a girl will give you even more and better sex.

Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Girl advice 14

We do not want serious answers to our questions. Evading answers is a best way to show us you are higher positioned than we are, and that is enough.

Girl advice 13

Physical domination is a big turn on when we step out of line. I am not talking about hitting us, but a firm arm gram to pull us closer for "a lesson", or throwing us on the bed will wake up "the tingle". There is something hot in knowing that we are nothing compared to our man's strength.

Girl advice 12

Apologizing is a way to lower your value in our eyes. Have you saw those people that do something shocking and just shrug it off? And how you look them with some "damn, he is an asshole, but he has balls" respect? Well, we watch him with "damn, he is an asshole, but I'm so wet" respect. Limit "I'm sorry" to once, maybe twice a year.

Monday, August 30, 2010

Girl advice 11

Nothing makes us want you more than seeing that other girls want you. The more girls you have on your tail, the more value you have to us.

Girl advice 10

When we say to you we are over you, we have never been more into you.

Girl advice 9

When we friendzone you, we know it very well. Do not believe the "I was not aware of your feelings, I really thought you just wanted to be my friend :(" story, we just wanted a loyal emotional tampon.

Girl advice 8

Don't use Facebook applications or spend too much time on Facebook. It sends us the message you have no life, so you are not interesting man to hang out with.

Sunday, August 29, 2010

Girl advice 7

A marriage ultimatum means we are falling out of love with you.

Girl advice 6

So, "Last adventure mode" from the previous post is a mode when a woman is aware that her assets are fading so she goes sex and the city style to be with some other men before she is lost forever in a shadows of younger and more attractive females.

Girl advice 5

When a woman turns 30, she goes to "desperate mode" if single, and "last adventure mode" if in a relationship.

Girl advice 4

Yes, we do like and want muscular men. Any girl who tells you otherwise is just rationalizing her lack of dating options.

Girl advice 3

It is true that ignoring us makes you look more interesting. But when you ignore us, have fun yourself, don't look bored and don't look at the ceiling, there is nothing more we want than man who has a good time in life and doesn't need us.

Saturday, August 28, 2010

Girl advice 2

When we say we have a boyfriend, ignore it or make fun of it. It is just a test to see if you are a man with more balls.

Girl advice 1

Watch sitcoms. Watch how men are stupid and females rule. Don't be like that. Do the opposite. We don't like to be smarter than our man.